Does Everyone Wonder...

What life might have been like had they taken a different path? Or is this just something I think about from time to time?

Now, Don't get me wrong! My life is great, I have a wonderful loving husband that does far more for me than I do for him (as far as I can see that is!). I have healthy, intelligent, active kids who have no problem with giving mom hugs and kisses and helping out where they can (for the most part, we do have our moments!). Granted life as a stay at home mom can get ruff, and anyone who says otherwise has never done it (at least not for any real length of time).

You see, the monotony is what kills ya as a stay at home parent. Same thing day in and day out. There is the added spice of children's antics and stresses of tantrums, but for the most part it's cleaning, laundry, grocery shopping, homework, cooking, mediation, finances, and a couple of other things thrown in here and there. And guess what all of those things have in common? Yup, the job is never really done. In fact they seldom stay done for a 24 hour period of time, and count your blessings if they stay done that long! :)

The thing that keeps me going as a stay at home mom is the fact that I know my children gain so much from it. When they come home from school they can always count on the fact that I will help them with homework and ask them about their day. I can help them with managing bully's or celebrate a lost tooth with them. When they fall off their bikes I'm always around to check if they are okay and to hold them and hug them until they have calmed down, and sometimes slap a band aid or two on if needed. They always have the same rules, they don't have to figure out what rules apply to home and what rules apply to daycare or other places. They also know that mom can come and get them from school if they are sick, or can read to them if they are having a hard day.

Honestly, I had a stay at home mom growing up, and I can't see letting anyone else raise my children except me or Jer.

But I often find myself wondering... where might I be had a chosen a different path. What if, instead of being a "preppy" kid I had chosen to be a bit rebellious. Would I have learned more about how life works or not? Would I be of the religious affiliation that I am. Would I be religious at all. Would I know what it is like to be drunk. Would I have a tattoo. Would I value the gentle qualities of my husband more? Or do I already value them that much? I don't know. Would I be in a stable relationship? Or would I be married to a complete butt head.

What if in college I had chosen to go into law, or medicine, or mechanical engineering, or political science? Would I have been a career woman now with a successful livelihood? Or maybe just another peon at a large corporation. Or even a politician? Would I be married? Because Jer and I met when I was "taking a break" from college for what I thought would be a year. Or would I be married to someone of quality but completely different.

Or maybe I would still be married to Jer but maybe not have had kids as quickly. What if he had finished school. Where would we be then? What if we had chosen to travel the world a little before "settling down", would we have even have children by now. Would we have adopted instead of having our own (like both of us fully expected to do)?

This isn't saying that I would want any of these "other" things. Sometimes I just wonder. And I wonder if other people wonder too.